Brian and I had a great time: getting a little shopping done at the mall (VS has their big sale-great prices on bras and panties-something I hardly ever let myself spend money on!) and eating at one of my favorite restaurants, On The Border. It's amazing how different dinners out are without the boys. Needless to say, we had a great time as usual.
We got home around 8:30 hoping to have both boys in bed. That was not the case. We opened the door to a sleepy little boy staring at us and telling us how happy he was that we were home. I'm not gonna lie and say I was a little sad he was still up but I soon understood the reason why he had not fallen asleep. Talking with my parents about the evening, Joey's sweet little voice kept repeating "I'm so happy you're home." I think we heard it nine or ten times. It really made me think what it's like for them when we go away. We continually reassure him before we leave that we will return and remind him when we do that we kept our promise. But sometimes that is just not enough.
Aren't we just like that with the Father? He continually reminds us that He is coming back, but I always feel like I am waiting up by the door for him. Everyday I see examples of his love and shepherding over my life and yet still find myself wondering where he is. I long for the day when I see him face to face and hear him say "I'm so happy you're home!"
I have done a lot of growing in this area of my spiritual life lately, trusting God that I do have a home to enjoy forever. For the longest time I had let fear drive my thoughts about heaven, and would spend many nights laying in bed being scared of dying. Looking back I realize how silly that really was. Why? Has He not promised me numerous times that he is coming back? How could I believe some of his promises but not this one? Why did I let fear run my life and many times steal my sleep?
It wasn't until I earnestly started praying about it and giving that fear over to God that anything changed. The devil knew he had a hold on me and made me feel embarrassed to tell anyone, especially God that I was afraid of dying. I just recently started exploring passages on heaven. I finally was able to read through Revelations without fear. I had always avoided that book because I simply did not want to think about it.
Now I long for heaven. I don't have a death-wish by any means, but my soul longs for the day when I can hear heaven's music and see my Father face to face. I have been reading books on people's accounts of going to heaven and returning. Two of my favorites are 90 Minutes In Heaven by Don Piper and Heaven Is For Real by Todd Burpo. The second book is by far one of my favorites and a must read for anyone who is doubting heaven.
Praise God that I have a forever home and will some day here from my Father's mouth "I'm so happy you're home!"
John 14:2 (from the Message)
1-4 "Don't let this throw you. You trust God, don't you? Trust me. There is plenty of room for you in my Father's home. If that weren't so, would I have told you that I'm on my way to get a room ready for you? And if I'm on my way to get your room ready, I'll come back and get you so you can live where I live. And you already know the road I'm taking."